I must say that this series has so far, not only been really fun to write, but also it has allowed me to take a step back and asses my kinks in a way I have not done before. Usually with fetishes once simply does what one likes, without much thought as to the why, but when trying to write about it, you are forced to delve into it – to really get to the source of your kinks to understand why you like what you like. In many ways, this has been a fascinating journey, but also one that has led me to want to push boundaries even more. I guess one of the results has been the introduction of pictures of me. This has been a really brave step for me as I value my privacy but I also wanted to channel my creativity in different ways. The fetishes have also recently taken a darker twist, and I am hoping to be able to discuss about this in the near future. Anyway, the reason I am writing all of this now is because this is the last post of the series.
There is one more kink left to write about (for now), and that is needle play, and whereas I love doing many other fetishes (such as wax and humiliation) this is one of the few fetishes I simply cannot live without.
Needle play is the most recent of my kinks discoveries. Initially it was one that fascinated me because it made me feel a bit queasy; the feel of the cold sharp needle, the piercing of the skin, the blood slowly running down the needle – it all looks very erotic but also very taboo.
During the summer my partner and I attended a poly masterclass event where you could take part in a multitude of different classes (see my review here for more info) which were tailored for poly and mono couples alike. The main event for me was the Introduction to Needleplay, which as I mentioned in my review, it was so informative and fascinating, I bought a beginner’s kit right there and then. Mind you, even then, when the demonstration was taking place, the feeling of unease was very much felt. I knew I didn’t necessarily wanted to see it, but I wanted to feel it.
Since then, my OH and I have done quite a few needle scenes, and each one has been a journey for the both of us. For me, needle play is once of those things that I need quite a lot of prep for, like with impact play. Physically my body needs to be warm, otherwise the needles hurt horrendously. Mentally I have to be in a certain mental space; I need to feel calm and aware of what is about to come – I need to be as clear-headed as possible as the subspace I get is quite heavy and deep. I find Tool’s 10,000 days is my go to album for scenes like this when I need to zone out and enjoy the ride. The initial needles always hurt quite a bit for me, but as my body gets used to it, the pain dissapears completely. Certain areas are of course more delicate than other, and for me I found that my chest area is a no-go as it is too sensitive and too close to my face (I was not lying when I said I don’t really love needles). My legs, cheeks and back are the places to go – with my upper back being my sweet spot.
There are many reasons I like needles; from the type of pain it produces, to the medical feel which leaves me feeling vulnerable. However, for me the main reason is the adrenaline release. No other sort of play results in my body releasing hormones in the way needleplay does. With impact or bondage, it is a very slow release, and it takes forever for me to get into a meditative state, but with needles, after 5 or 6 needles I feel this wave inside me and I am out for the count. It is better than any drug out there.
So that is it from the Kinks series. I hope you have enjoyed reading it as much as I have enjoyed writing them. For the next few weeks I have a few reviews of some exciting toys and fetish gear O have, so stay tuned!