You know how they say that yoga is a very personal practice? As in, your journey through yoga is very different to other’s journey and practice? Well, the same can be said with BDSM. For some, it is a lifestyle, for others it is just a bit of fun. The important thing is that regardless of the capacity of your involvement, it should be fun and with consent.
Thanks to good old Google, there are a multitude of online resources that offer a vast amount of information. Some are better than others, as with everything in life. Below is my personal list, but one that is far from exhaustive. As BDSM gains popularity, the number of sites are on the increase, but sadly a lot of them just offer very biased and misinformed opinions. I have picked my personal favourites, many of them are a bit old, but they are very good – not only as a starting point but to anyone with questions/looking for inspiration. As mentioned, this is MY list, you may have other sources you prefer – and that is fine, BDSM is a very broad subject and every one will have their own preferences and needs. If anything, let me know your preferred list is so that I can check it out. I am always keen on learning more and more. So without further ado, let’s delve in:
- If you are very new to BDSM and still coming to terms with all the terminology, The London Fetish Scene’s Wipipedia FAQ is a really good place to start. The FAQ page covers everything from the definitions of Fetish and BDSM, advice when attending an event, to how to tie a corset. I always recommend this website to anyone, even those who may have been in the scene for some time, as I believe when it comes to BDSM, the learning never stops. I will warn you the site has not been updated in a while but the information is still very much relevant. The LFS is also a good place to know what events are taking place in London – however, I find that only the really big events show up in this site. For a more comprehensive list of all events, nothing beats Fetlife.
- If you are more on the submissive side, and want to develop/know more within this area, then The Submissive Guide is the perfect place for you. This is the very first BDSM website I read, and it honestly did help me considerably in understanding a lot of the psychological aspects I was experiencing during my first submission. The website covers from fundamentals, to communication, D/s relationships, dealing with impact play and how to develop your own submissive style. It is very informative whilst still being easy to read and understand. The site does get updated often enough, and you can purchase additional material on certain topics, but I would say that the site itself is pretty exhaustive as it is without the need to spend cash.
- On the other side of the spectrum we have The Dominant Guide which is linked to the Submissive Guide so the layout and format is similar. As a Switch, this website as well as the the previous one were a very useful source of information when I first started and even now I still refer to them often when I have questions or looking for inspiration.
- If you are after videos, then one of my favourite professional Dominant Morgan Thorne on Youtube is a fantastic source of endless information. I love the way she talks as she takes her time explaining everything that is important and is very good at providing information in a way that is easy and useful. I particularly like her flogging videos, and I have recommend them to some of my friends too and they all agree. As she is a professional Dominant, her videos are more towards the Dominant/Tops but she does also cover topics that are very useful to bottoms/submissive types. She is also on Instagram.
- If you are more on the submissive side, then there is only one person I can truly recommend in Youtube and that is Evie Lupine. She may be young, but don’t let that fool you – she actually knows her stuff! She is very much like me in the sense that she has a wide range of fetishes that she is into, but unlike me, she is really keen on petplay (which I am yet to fully immense myself into) She is very well spoken, takes her time to explain terminology and aspects of certain fetishes, and is just very well educated in the subject. You can also follow her on IG here.
- This is going to be a controversial option, but I like this website so on the list it goes! The best way to describe XR University is to think of it as a video ‘podcast’ hosted by Ian Rath and Aiden Starr. They take what I would call a ‘hands-on’ approach, so you get a nice demonstration of how to use the majority of sex toys out there, as well as BDSM furniture and equipment. Some may call this site porn, and to that I say, so what? Sometimes you need to see something, rather than read it, to fully understand what the gist is! I will admit that not all of their videos are great, but their older one are definitely a must, such as the Dungeon Protocol and The Flooging Show.
I could keep going with this list, but this post is already quite long as it is so I will stop here for now. I hope this has been useful to some of you, and like I mentioned at the beginning, let me know what your recommendations are. My next event-related review will be for Bad Bruises which is taking place on Thursday 18th of April, so until then, have fun and be safe!!
All images sourced from here.
A Sense of Clarity 